Monday 14 September 2015

How I deal with anxiety/depression



Hey everyone and welcome back to my blog :)

So this next post is some tips I've learnt along the way of how to deal with anxiety and depression in the most positive ways. Mental health is something I am so serious about when I mention because it is a very serious subject. I have written 2 previous posts on this matter , one being my battle with mental health issues, you can find that here  and the other being an update on how I am doing, which is here and today I want to bring to you ways that work for me and hopefully they might work for you too. I have had to be more open minded about this lately as I can tend to get in to a rut and not allow anything to work. Just remember if these tips don't work for you do not despair, everyone is different but just keep looking and trying new things that do work for you :) 

                                        Be Open-minded and ask for help

So in order to get on the right track again you need to open your mind to help. You need to want to get help. Look at the problem for what it is, ask yourself is how you're feeling really that bad that you cannot get on with your day. If the answer is YES then great, write down how you're feeling at that present time, what  might have triggered it and set out some plans for the day, keep your mind and body active so you're not sat dwelling on it and in time you will feel better for it than going back to bed, then later on that day write down what you did and how you are feeling since. If the answer is NO then ask for help, whether it be a friend, a partner, a family member or work colleague, talk to somebody you trust and knows about your mental health. Tell them how you're feeling, listen to their advice, you don't always have to take their advice but sometimes someone might say something and it  just clicks. I find when I'm having an extremely bad day I talk to Anthony about a million times that day, I could repeat myself over and over but he just listens or we try to come up with a plan to make me feel somewhat normal again, I cry I laugh and it helps. It doesn't fix it but in that moment and time I feel a small bit better than I did starting out



Exercise and eat well

Ok I'm not gonna preach on this one because I am the laziest person ever when it comes to exercise, I will think up every excuse not to do it and I wonder why I'm not losing weight. But hand on my heart I can tell you now there is no better release and good feeling after a hard workout. When I go through my phases of being fit and exercising nearly every day I have very rare bouts of anxiety. I reckon its your body releasing the tension and all that comes with depression and anxiety. It certainly keeps it at bay. This is something I need and want to do more of. 

 Guys ever hear the saying "you are what you eat" this relates to mental health so much. I feel when I go on a binge I am feeding that little shit depression and I get so down about it. It does absolutely nothing for my physical and mental health. Depression feeds off negativity and crap so what you eat really shows not just on the outside but on the inside too. When I am eating healthy and I'm not talking about mad posh food I'm talking about home cooked non-processed, healthy meals, I feel good, my jeans are a little less tighter, my head isn't as cloudy, I have more energy, I don't go for naps!! .It is simple once you put your mind to it and focus. What keeps me eating healthy lately is knowing that I am the one laughing at my depression/anxiety and the more good I eat the more I am pushing it away. It's all in the mind and how you control things is how you will feel. I'm telling you, try it for a week and see how you feel, I can guarantee you, you will feel somewhat better in yourself, again it;'s not gonna get rid of it but push it further away. 


Write it down

 I find this works to a certain extent. I love writing as it comes natural to me. However you need to be careful, when you write it down be sure that you are being 100% honest with yourself, as scary as it may look on paper, it's then taken out of your head for a few minutes and its on paper. You can read back on this as you progress and use it as a guide as to how you are coping since. It can be very hard writing it down but even harder reading back. I have read back on some things I have written in the past and have gotten a fright from what I read, but you need to see the positive side of it. I don't feel half as bad now as I did when I wrote it and that is progress and victory in itself,  I also find writing it in poem form is a good release and its being creative too :)



Meditation 

I find this so relaxing and helpful at times. Don't get me wrong when I am in the depths of it the last thing I even think about doing is listening to anything all I want is to be under my duvet BUT lately when I have been feeling it come on, before I even let it, I slip away to a room where I know I wont be disturbed, I sit back and put some relaxing music on, I will leave a link to some YouTube videos that I find extremely soothing. I concentrate on my breathing and the sounds on the video and that is all. I have to turn my mind off otherwise it'll blow up. So just give yourself 20 minutes to unwind and take note of how you feel after.  20 minute mediation  20 min meditation sound scope  Peace Relax 

Declutter 

This one to me I find so important. I find when I am in a messy environment my mind is so clogged up and I literally cannot think straight and it makes me agitated, anxious and angry. When my mind is in a state of depression you will find that my bedroom will look like a bomb has hit it or my car.... don't even get me started on that!! So your environment reflects your mind. It's like the whole you are what you eat thing, Declutter and tidy things away, light some candles, open some windows and allow it to declutter your mind too.


                                        Keep your friends and family close

This one I have learnt lately is so important. Keep your loved ones close. with Depression we tend to push away everyone you love , this is out of fear of what they might think, or that you may feel like a let down to them, but to beat depression you need to go against it. Do things you know its going to hate, like for example making plans to meet a friend for some lunch or a spot of shopping, when doing these kind of things not only are you laughing at depression but you are getting to spend quality time with people you love. You need support in life no mater what your circumstances so please do not push them away because they are all you have at the end of the day and they don't think your crazy or stupid for feeling the way you do. You can actually teach them about mental health and make them more aware of it OR you could find out that they too may suffer and need your supprt too. So help one another 


                                                    Take up a hobby

Again while this is all about keeping yourself busy, it's also about allowing yourself to find out what it is you love to do. Make time for yourself. It could be something simple like an art class or yoga, or even blogging :) Find what you enjoy and embrace it. I started blogging off a whim and did not think I would last a  week let alone be sat here 7 months down the line sharing tips on how to deal with mental health. But blogging has helped me so much as it's a release. Like I said before I love to write but it took me years to really find that one out :) So give it time, play around with a few things, if you take up an art class and find that it's not for you then that is OK, you don't need to go back but just keep searching because you will find it :) 





Look after number one

This is VITAL!! In order for you to be any use to anyone else you need to look after yourself. This one I have learnt alot over the past few months thanks to Anthony. He has always assured me that I need to be mentally ok to look after Lucy, while I am always 100% stable to look after her, some days can be a challenge as to any normal mother, but in order for me to be happy for her and be able to interact with her all day I need to ensure that I am feeling ok and by doing so I follow the previous steps



Do not Underestimate your illness

You often hear some people say "ah you could be so much worse off" "look at what you have around you" "be grateful for what you have" , while they may think they're helping, they are indeed not!!! With depression comes a lot of guilt and I myself have found myself going back and fourth like table tennis in my head having arguments with myself over this exact thing, like why do I feel this way when I have a  beautiful family, why am I so down when I'm in the whole of my health, why am I so anxious when I don't have any real worries, it's a constant contradiction. But you cannot argue these things because it is an illness. Mental health is just as serious as any other disease. It is a disease of the brain and mind and completely invisible! This is why the stigma has to stop and people need to be more aware. Mental illness ends in suicide more often than it should.




Get rid of negativity

This is a bit like de-cluttering really. If you allow negative things or people in to your life they are not going to have any positive effect on you so bin it. As harsh as that may sound, but it's either you stay connected with negative things just to please them and allow your mental heath to deteriorate or you change it and seek positive vibes in life. Don't be around people that will bring you down but ones that lift you up. :) Also what I like to do is decorate my home with little positive quotes or signs and leave them around the house. You can pick these up in Penneys for as little as €2 and up! It's all about embracing the positivity and bringing it in to your home and life. When your mind sees positive things it trains it in to thinking positive things. Every little helps !




                                                    Don't ever give up


Last but not least this is the main one. Please DON'T ever give up!! I know how hard it can get at times and I know when you are in that exact moment it can so easily happen but when you are in that zone just think of everyone around you who love you dearly and who would be lost without you. If you have children picture their little faces without you in their life. It would be the biggest tragedy to occur and you would be a massive loss to people. Talk talk talk and don't stop until you feel your ready. Cry it out, do whatever it takes to save your life, but please don't suffer in silence or alone, people are there to help all you have to do is ask :) 



So they are some things that I hope you can take with you today and hopefully help you through some of your dark days. Please let me know what you do in order to deal with it and if you find my tips anyway useful please do let me know ! 

Thank you all for reading

Until next time
Lots of love 



2 comments:

  1. This was a lovely post Grainne. I definitely agree with it - especially the decluttering and the getting rid of negativity. It's amazing how much negativity there is out there and how it can creep in, none of us deserve to carry around someone else's negative thoughts with us every day.

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    1. Thanks a mill Sharon :) too much negativity ! Just no need for it ! Ignorance can be bliss xx

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